She Got A Husband and A Boyfriend, She Lit!
Recently a friend of mine reached out to me and she surprised me with what she had to say. She and her husband had decided to give an open marriage a try. They set up their respective Tinder pages and it was on from there.
Of course my first reaction was shock, "open marriage? Like you're free to sleep with other men and he can sleep with other women? How does that work?" Well, she immediately started getting matches and initially met two guys that she liked, and slept with one of them right away. She said her husband had hall passes too, hadn't used them but she was totally fine if he did.
I know what you're thinking, because it's what I was thinking...
Feelings are going to get involved, someone's obviously going to get jealous and this is not going to end well; right? Wrong! Her sex life improved with her husband and she gained confidence that she didn't have before. She always tells her husband when she has a date or a hook-up planned and he loves it! Her husband decided to only look for women who were in open relationships and she used the fact that she wanted no strings attached fun as a tag line. Apparently guys don't give a shit one way or the other and think it's cool. She had several guys she could reach out to when she wanted her itch scratched and it made her sexier to herself and her husband.
Fast forward a few months and here's where things gets interesting.
She now has a boyfriend. Oh and the husband too! They continued meeting people and are now both dating other people. The same couple!! Yes they are dating another married couple which is very uncommon. Polyamorous is the lifestyle they've chosen. Their kids are all besties but don't know about their lifestyle. Yes they have kids. They think mommy is at "book club" when she's out on a date. One set will have all the kids while the other will go out on a date or have alone time; sometimes they even hang out all together. Her relationship with the husband seems to be stronger than her husband's with the wife. They are pretty much dating exclusively while her husband and the wife are casually dating and still seeing other people. They've even started to say the "L"word. She's totally transparent with her husband and she says that's the biggest rule in their arrangement. They discuss a list of scenarios and how they would each feel if said scenario comes to fruition. If she or her husband are ever uncomfortable, then it doesn't happen.
The way she sees it society teaches us that conventional marriage is better. That you should be monogamous and stay with one person forever. Being poly is basically accepting that people can have more than one "perfect" person. She and her boyfriend are doing remarkably well and they've been doing the Keto diet and she's lost 31 pounds in 3 weeks. He is helping her come out of her shell and helping her relationship with her husband. She actually sees it being a long term situation or at least their families being very close.
I personally couldn't do the open marriage/ relationship thing because I have a very jealous personality and I don't like to share. I would honestly be concerned about my dude falling for someone else and leaving me. However, it seems to be working for them. They trust each other and are really open about it. They established ground rules and seem to be respecting each other.
So Cookie Followers here's where you come in. What do you think about their arrangement? Do you think you could do it? Do you think it will work out for them or are they setting themselves up for failure? Send me your thoughts to firstname.lastname@example.org or join the Crunching Cookies Facebook group and remember "Nothing's Too Risque'.